“I’m proud you guys are both smart and cool.

The pair-O’Reilly in a regular suit and tie, Miller in his boots, jeans, white shirt, and black jacket-delivered all the celebrity this audience needed. Miller was fleeing town before the correspondents dinner, saying he didn’t want to have to “walk around and pretend Wolf Blitzer’s Pliny the Elder instead of an ineffectual U-boat commander.” Asked by an audience member why he was going to be there, O’Reilly replied, “Some things you have to do.” Just not as often or as wildly as Miller. “He thought he’d ride it out and win, and didn’t want the job enough.” He didn’t take it personally, natch, just chalked it up to Romney being a wimp. O’Reilly made the offer and, even after speaking personally to Ann, never got a call back from the campaign. In O’Reilly’s view, he also fumbled “an amazing opportunity” and perhaps victory by turning down a full hour with him on Fox just before the election. Newt Gingrich “put on eight pounds” every day of the campaign, and “the bigger he got, the testier he got.”Īs for Mitt Romney, O’Reilly says he fumbled the Benghazi issue- his best opportunity to make points against Obama-in the foreign-policy debate. Rick Perry had a problem getting beyond “howdy” and “looking sharp.” Rick Santorum talked about religion, and shouldn’t have. Ron Paul passed one bill, renaming a post office, in 22 years in Congress. Which leads to a staple of O’Reilly’s shtick since then: a critique of the 2012 GOP field. Which raises the question of how did Obama win reelection. That’s not who he pretended to be,” he said. “He didn’t come on like Winston Churchill. In his Objective Analyst mode, O’Reilly added that Obama can’t be blamed because he never sold himself as a bold leader. “What kind of a message does this send when the commander in chief will not define the enemy?” he thundered. O’Reilly started right off shouting (literally) at Obama for not tagging the Boston Marathon attacks “Islamic jihad” right after they occurred.

And the conclusion: “You’re gay, you’re gay. “Right above global warming at 8 billion and 46 th.” Wild applause (because let’s face it, you can rarely go wrong trashing global warming). Here’s how he put it: In a world that is absolutely crazy, if human beings with similar genitals love each other enough to want to get married, “that is about 8 billion and 45 th on my list of stuff I have time to worry about.” Applause (because it’s Washington, and moderates in metro areas are moving in that direction).

Miller did come right out and call himself socially liberal, and proved it in a segment on gay marriage. He raised the issue of his faith, then summed up his beliefs-vaguely-as, “Somebody created Charles Darwin.” So how does he feel about the right to die? Not clear. Read that back to me before you doze off.’ ” ‘You know honey, those waffles in the freezer are really old.’ ‘What’s that, you want me to have you put down if you get a cold?’ ‘I didn’t say that. His takeaway: “I no longer mumble around my wife. “My only hope is that Democrats will eventually do it in on their own when they find out to participate in it, you might need a photo ID,” he said, to a burst of knowing laughter and applause.īelieve it or not, judging by laughter volume, one of Miller’s funniest riffs is about Terri Schiavo, the Florida woman at the center of a tragic 1998 right-to-die case. Not to mention “Obamacare”-which Miller compared to “a big sweaty encyclopedia salesman” the country accidentally let into the front room and will find tough to get back onto the porch. Who got booed? President Obama, of course. To be fair, Miller also poked fun at his own spreading bald spot and budding man breasts. Biden’s “maniacal glee face” recalls the Cleveland Indians logo. Pelosi looks like she’s “perpetually witnessing the docking of the Hindenburg” and “is in more over her head than a gay dwarf hitting on Shaq.” James Carville looks like a “satanic Chihuahua under a strobe light” and also a Muppet who accidentally got washed on hot. I lost count early on of the number of jokes insulting people and the way they look-men, women, Democrats, Republicans. That might have been the least politically incorrect thing said all evening. Must be a Democrat,” he said to my (male) friend, who rushed to our seats to report the conversation. In the men’s room, one hand dryer was blowing out a powerful gust of air, the other just a trickle, and a guy in the hand-drying line thought he’d get a jump on the show. They still talk about Barney Frank, and he did retire. On second thought, she might endure as a punch line. I have no idea what these guys will talk about once Nancy Pelosi retires. That said, some of the topics were familiar. Where the two groups intersect is their intense engagement in politics.īolder and Fresher is FoxWorld goes to Broadway-raw, risqué, and with more screaming than TV.

Bill o reilly barney frank